Contrast

My MRI with contrast came back showing no tumors, as I mentioned in yesterday's post. I will need to go back in another 6 months to have another one done to make sure there still aren't tumors.

My mood today has been one of extreme contrast too. I'm happy there are no tumors, but I have anxiety about what is going on with me.

I wish I knew the cause, especially when my medicine wears off and I start the jolts/spasms/twitches all over again. I'm tired today.

But, I don't think I'm supposed to know the cause yet or I would already know it. Trust. I must tell myself to trust. Trust God. Trust the doctors. Trust my own knowledge of my limitations.

Of course, I saw contrast a lot today too. The following were from my drive home. I left work somewhat early because today is my husband's birthday.

Today's lesson, I think, is patience. I'll know when I'm supposed to know. In the meantime, I'll just need to learn to weather it out.

The other lesson is that I can't ignore God anymore. He's everywhere. I ran away from Him for a long time. But, as these images show, He's made Himself hard for me to ignore. I felt like the sky was opening up with brightness. I had to pull my car over to watch. The tug at me was too strong to continue driving without stopping.

Peace and hugs,
Jen

The Sun Sets on My Anxiety Over Some Things

I found out today that I don't have tumors in my cervical spine.

Yay! This was a, "just in case," MRI. Now, I just get to go back in 6 months to make sure I STILL don't have tumors and that this is a so called incidental find that I have fluid inside my spine where it is not supposed to be.

Amen.